Feeling uneasy...

its time i turn to my diary after so long. sorry i neglected you.

why its time to come back here, u may ask. the reason would be that i found out that i might be in love with my bestfriend whom i always have a heart to heart talk with. i would rather not let her find out that i have feelings for her, so i cant find her to talk about this. this explains why i m talkin to u again.

i chose to run away from her coz i m too embarrassed to express my feelings to her, also knowing that it will lead to nowhere eventually. i decided to run away for a year, not contacting her. i know it hard but i hope the feelings would just fade. meeting her as usual would prolly increase the chances of telling her the truth which i dont want.

to my bestfriend:

When i know u saw someone u like and u told me about it happily. it hurts.
When u say there is no one that u know fitted to be a candidate, it hurts.
When i know in your heart i m nth more than just a bestfriend, it hurts.
And when u know that i m leaving u, u got hurt, it hurts even more.
I hope u forgive me for running away for i m not ready to tell u the truth.
God bless us both.